Can't we do any better than Deflategate 2015?

I am tired of the use of the suffix"gate" to indicate a scandal or problem. I implore the media to find another term that is less hackneyed, trite and clichéd. Some of us are old enough to remember that during the reign of King Richard Nixon in 1972 either King Richard or his campaign manager sanctioned an illegal act.

The Watergate is a complex of five buildings in Washington, D.C. comprised of office buildings, apartments and a hotel. In 1972 during the election campaign, The Democratic National Committee was using the center for political activities. A team of burglars entered the building and the office of the DNC to install wiretapping equipment and to steal sensitive political documents. The dastardly deed was discovered and many heads rolled including King Richard who resigned later. The event will forever be known as the Watergate Scandal.

Ever since other miscreant deeds have been described using the suffix "gate" not only in America but around the world. It is a banal, tired term used to suggest unethical behaviors including a cover up.

In 2004 one of the most risqué ones occurred during a football game. It has been termed Nipplegate because during the half-time entertainment of Super Bowl XXXVIII. Justin Timberlake and Janet Jackson were allegedly entertaining. No evidence has ever been provided to support the claim. Timberlake, acting out the lyrics of the song ripped off a part of Jackson's bodice and revealed her breast albeit very briefly. There have been hundreds of similar wardrobe malfunctions since then as they have spread like a bad summer rash.

In 2014 we had Bridgegate. Allegations were made that New Jersey governor Chris Christie ordered lane closures from Ft. Lee to the George Washington Bridge because the Ft. Lee mayor did not endorse his reelection.

In the 1990's we had Monicagate a.k.a. as Lewinskygate, Tailgate, Sexgate and Zippergate. Miss Lewinsky had an inappropriate relationship with then Pres. Clinton. No details are needed. He was impeached but it was overturned later.

In 2011 we had the most hilarious Weinergate. U.S. Representative Anthony Weiner had a twitter account that was linked to an inappropriate photo of his "w....." He yelled hacker. Later he admitted that he had sent numerous lewd photos of his private parts. He resigned. Later ran for NYC mayor but dropped out when it was revealed that he was still sending lewd pictures. He is now living in Stupidville on Dim-wit Lane.

In 2007 we had Spygate as the Patriots were caught filming the Jets defense signals. They paid hefty fines as did Belichick. Now we have Deflategate. After the Colts lost to the Patriots last week it was determined that the Patriots used balls that were not inflated to the required amount. Come on media. Isn't there a better, less stale term than deflategate?

I have some alternate terms for consideration: Pig Bladder Failure; Putrified Pigskin; Loose Leather Leaves Lesions; I Have No Knowledge of the Puny Pigskin; Cheater Cheater Football Eater; Once A Cheater always a Cheater; After The Ball Is Lowered.

Anything but Deflategate.

Larry Vandeventer grew up North of Calvertville and Graduated from Worthington High School and Indiana State. Contact him at Goosecrick@aol.com or 317-839-7656.