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Saturday, Feb. 11, 2012
If you think about it, the Super Bowl isn't really super
Posted Monday, February 6, at 12:31 PM
I am so old I remember the first Super Bowl played in 1966 in Los Angeles with about 70,000 in attendance. That was 46 years ago and I was very young. I think I was in the first grade. Maybe. Tickets cost $12. The NFL and AFL were combatants and this was a playoff of the two conferences. The teams were the Green Bay Packers coached by the venerable Vince Lombardi and the Kansas City Chiefs coached by Hank Stram...

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38 is middle age whether you like it or not
Posted Monday, January 30, at 12:09 PM

Sometimes we must smell things we don't want to smell, see things we don't want to see and hear things we don't want to hear. Here goes one of those situations: If you are 38 years old you are middle age and perhaps a tad past it. Deal with it. Americans are obsessed with age. ...

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SAR Is Not the Belgium Airline
Posted Thursday, January 26, at 2:53 PM

There are some letters when strung together cause fear to wriggle in the depths of your stomach like an eel that has lost his electric power. It begins with slight movement then quickly escalates to thrashing about like the arms of a presidential candidate as he denies having an affair with his secretary when everyone knows he is lying...

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It may be time to clean out the fridge
Posted Monday, January 16, at 11:39 AM

Today's column is a detritus of thoughts. When you open the Westinghouse and seven items fall out mashing your big toes and the nails become a lovely burnt sienna, and you could appear as a guest on History Channel's Rock Stars, it is time to clean the fridge...

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Disappointment is a part of life for us all
Posted Monday, January 9, at 2:07 PM

Disappointment is a frequent travel companion along the road of life. At times it seems to be the only one who cares enough to accompany weary travelers. It can ride in the front seat, the back seat or the trunk. It can whisper in your ear or shout as loud as a crack of thunder in a summer electrical rain storm. It is that feeling we experience when we are denied what we want or believe we richly deserve...

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What has 'the season' become for all of us?
Posted Wednesday, January 4, at 2:48 PM

It is the day after Christmas and I am basking in the glow of Christmas. Friday this week we go to Cincy to celebrate with our family and granddaughters. More eating. More gifting. More eating. More driving. More fun with the family. "Joy To The World."...

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Earl and Opal make me laugh
Posted Wednesday, December 28, at 1:29 PM

I am shocked at the high percentage of people who never read the comics section in the newspaper or even subscribe to or read papers. My day would not be complete without reading the paper and the comics section. The comics tickle my funny bone and provide deep insights into life today. ...

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Buying jeans can be a traumatic experience
Posted Tuesday, December 20, at 1:56 PM

I have way too many choices to make in most avenues of my life. A casual glance at most restaurant menus is enough to make my ears bleed. On the rare occasions that I enter the inner sanctums of Kroger I get vertigo trying to wade through the maze of brands. I had the same experience recently when I went into the land of denim to buy jeans...

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One of these days I'm going to ...do it all
Posted Thursday, December 8, at 3:38 PM

One of these days I'm going to do many things that I have been planning to do for ages. I'm really going to do them. Bob Tackett gave me a "Round To It" many years ago -- a wooden coin-like device with Round To It painted on it. Now if I could just find it we can get started...

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I Am A Rebel, You Can't Stop Me
Posted Monday, December 5, at 3:55 PM

I am a rebel; a wild child spinning out of control, running free. You can't stop me. You are not my boss. You cannot make me. I live life on the edge. That is my philosophy and don't try to change me. I rebel in many ways. The people who refine and sell oil for my car and yours, advocate that we change the oil in our cars every 3,000 miles. ...

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Signs Are Hilarious
Posted Tuesday, November 29, at 10:13 AM

I enjoy reading signs and finding the humor they unintentionally evoke. I was driving down the street one day and read a sign that stated, "Pouch" sale. I think they meant porch. I was leaving the fitness center and encountered a sign at the top of the stairs that stated, "Watch your step." I didn't know which one was mine so I couldn't comply with the directive...

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Blustery night after practice leads to bad experience
Posted Wednesday, November 16, at 12:15 PM

It was one of those blustery nights in late October approaching Halloween. The air was redolent with the smell of burning leaves. The full moon was ducking in and out of the clouds as they skittered across the sky like children playing tag on the school ground...

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IDK when it comes to texting ... LOL
Posted Monday, November 14, at 1:16 PM

I do not text. E-mails are my genre. However, there are millions of people who twitter and tweet messages. Some people are obsessive/compulsive about texting waiting for responses and texting again and checking for responses ad nauseam. The message is limited to about 140 characters so a myriad of abbreviations have been developed to conserve space...

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'I bet everyone in heaven gets a guinea pig'
Posted Monday, November 7, at 2:31 PM

My column today is an orthography quilt. There are few things more aesthetically appealing than a hand-sewn quilt. I can sit and contemplate some that we have and go back in time remembering the dresses, pajamas, shirts and other items of apparel that my family has worn over the years. A veritable gallimaufry of life events. Today's quilt should warm you a bit...

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My 'Liberty Bell' isn't really cracked
Posted Monday, October 10, at 1:03 PM

"You read from a different page don't you," a friend of mine said recently. "Maybe," I countered, "What page are you on?" OK, I am a bit obtuse at times. Some people think there is a large crack in my Liberty Bell if you know what I mean. They think I am weird. Why? Because I see the humor in so many people, places and events that comprise our daily living...

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Items found in storage bring back a lot of memories
Posted Monday, September 12, at 1:57 PM

(This column was written by BW -- Wanda -- my soulmate of more than 50 years.) Time machines exist. In my case it was constructed of several large fiber barrels. I saved everything in my youth. When we moved, which was often, we moved everything because there was no time to purge...

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New toilet would have been great on the farm
Posted Tuesday, August 30, at 2:29 PM

When the temperature is colder than a dog's nose on the back of my knee in late August, I tend to take care of business quickly. Frost on the punkin' is nothing compared to the frost on the two-holer. The first can be endured the latter cannot. When the temperature is hotter than the interior of a car baking in the parking lot at Sprawl Mart in Phoenix in August things don't come out right...

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Too much activity can be a family killer
Posted Monday, August 1, at 2:22 PM

One of the greatest killers of family life and togetherness is activity. People flit from one event to another never touching down long enough to establish residency or to develop meaningful relationships. They call it "My hectic life or my busy life."...

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Edward Scissorhands is a mean man
Posted Monday, July 25, at 12:32 PM

Sometimes the world just reaches up and slaps me in the face and says, "How do you like them apples, Hillbilly?" When I say, "I don't like it." It retorts, "If you don't like it, lump it. Take it or leave it because it ain't going to get any better." Consequently my face looks like I lost a face slapping contest with Edward Scissorhands...

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Brits say women should dress in suitable manner
Posted Monday, July 18, at 3:00 PM

This just in, a new poll to tell women what to wear. It seems that the British are not finished with trying to tell we colonists how to conduct our lives. I thought we settled that at Yorktown with the surrender of General Cornwallis. If he had been a member of King Arthur's round table he would have been named Sir Render. ...

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My World
By Larry Vandeventer
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